Thursday, January 06, 2005

Steps to a new Michel!

I have decided to break my own rule and have a new year resolution or five. Please support me! I will need help from all my friends to make these key changes in my life. Happy new year tyme!


1) I will no longer use old underwear in a collage.

2) I will honor my dead canary, James von Douche, by creating a collage detailing his short life.

3) I will no longer masturbate to the female part of the Land's End catalog.

4) I will ask mother to keep her shirt on when friends come over no matter how warm or intoxicated she may be.

5) I will not hug birds so hard.

5 comments:

Alekx said...

1. Old underward is not a good thing for collage as sometimes those brown streaks are a real turn off for others.

2. I think your poor little dead canary will be very happy to have a memorial dedicated to him

3. We can get you better catalogs to masturbate to than Land's End. Honest. I'll do all I can to help in this endevor


4. I think you will have a harder time with Mother but it is quite brave of you to try.

5. All birds are rejoicing in this resolution

Burfica said...

A pet rock is easy to hug and not hurt. And they always smile. hehehehee
Just super glue mom's shirt on.
Yeah people don't like underwear on art unless it's g-strings and bra's
I'm with the girls, get a Fredricks of holly wood or victoria secret, or even playboy to masterbate too. Ditch the Lands end. hehehee

Michel Johansen said...

The thing is that Mother allows no magazines in the house, and all i have is a Lands End catalog from '89, that I have to hide in the crawl space at Willy's house.

So, you know, I have to make it work!

Alekx said...

Maybe we should just convert you to the neighborhood peeping tom...

Astrid said...

Haha ... *Astrid shakes her pom-poms and wiggles around* You go boy!!! So far so good?