CrazyMcStickWacker

I don't know what's up with Willy? After a couple of weeks of calls, I finally reached him last night. He said he was watching some intense women's softball game on the telly, and that's why he couldn't play Crazy McStickWacker with me in Mr. Johnson's woods.

He said, "I really want to, NO REALLY (he got kind of breathy with this part), i'd like nothing more than to run through the woods NAKED with you". Then i said, "i never said anything about naked, Willy". Then he said "OH, THE GAME'S BACK ON!" and then his television made a zipper sound.

BUT WHO CARES! I don't need "friends"! I have Alice now! We don't need anything but art, and performance, and bags of turpentine soaked shredded documents, and the pale white surface of her bottom for writing messages in various condiments about injustices.

Mother i think is getting worried about how much tyme i have been spending with Alice. Just yesterday She tells me, "Stop hanging out with that hippy whore, and get your mother a high-ball." I don't get why she is not happy for Michel. But you know what I do when mother makes me feel like less?

I get myself two Butter Pops from the freezer, pop in the second season of Perfect Strangers (ON BETA!), and hug myself.

Bronson Pinchot warms me right up.